Tips for Toilet Training
This resource provides advice on the early stages of daytime toilet training. There is large variation in when families choose to toilet train and when children are ready. However, In the UK 90% of three year olds are dry most days (NHS, 2023). Prior to toilet training children need to be able to have an awareness of when their bladder or bowel is reaching fullness and be able to delay in enough time to use the toilet. Other signs of toilet training readiness can be found on the Peoples Occupational Therapy 10 signs of toilet training readiness resource.
Toilet training can be a challenge for all families, and children with Developmental Disabilities such as Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) are likely to experience additional toileting challenges (Matson and LoVullo 2009). The below advice is recommended for all children, however, if you encounter greater challenges, such as those cause by sensory processing differences, then an Occupational Therapist can provide individualised support for your child and family.
Before you start
1. Get your child familiar with the toilet by reading them a story book or social story about toileting
2. Change them in the toilet if possible, to start the association between wee, poo, and the toilet.
3. Make the toilet an inviting space (e.g. add a book box, stickers on the wall).
4. Talk to your child about the toilet “I need a wee so I am going to the toilet” and if you are comfortable let them observe you and talk through the steps you are taking.
5. Pretend play that dolls and teddies are using the toilet.
6. Get your child to choose pants that they would like to use (e.g. featuring their favourite TV character).
7. Note down roughly when you child goes in their nappy for a few days to get an idea of when they usually go.
8. Make sure your child is able to sit comfortably on the toilet (or potty if preferred) by themselves. They should be able to place two feet on the floor. If using the toilet use a foot stall and children’s toilet seat to help.
Getting Started
1. Protect your floor and furniture as best you can (e.g. using washable covers).
2. Choose a time when it is calm, and you can stay home for a few days.
3. Remove your child’s nappy and get them to wear their chosen pants.
4. Have lots of spare changes of pants and clothes to hand.
5. Take your child to the toilet when you expect them to go (refer to the notes you previously made to help you).
6. When waiting for a bowel movement on the toilet read a book together, blow bubbles (which can help with pushing), or tell a story – wait a maximum of 5 minutes.
7. If your child is showing signs that they need to wee in the moment (e.g. squirming, crossing legs) encourage them to use the toilet.
8. Encourage your child to use the toilet shortly after eating as digestion can lead to the urge to have a bowel movement.
9. Provide a reward for successful attempts on the toilet (e.g. a sticker, praise)
10. After a successful attempt on the toilet wait at least an hour to try again.
11. Accidents will happen. When your child has an accident be patient just clean it up and help them get changed.
12. Make sure to include all the steps in toileting e.g. wiping, pulling up pants, washing hands. However, understand success at these steps may come at different times.
Remember if your child is having challenges with toilet training it may be that they are not yet ready or that they need more individualised support. It can help to consult an Occupational Therapist to get a more individualised plan for you and your child.
Good Luck!
Dr Teresa Joyce
Peoples Occupational Therapy
Bibliography
Contact (2023) Potty and Toilet Training. https://contact.org.uk/help-for-families/information-advice-services/health-medical-information/common-concerns/potty-and-toilet-training/
Kramer, M.S (2021) Beyond Parenting Advice. How Science Should Guide Your Decision on Pregnancy and Child-Rearing. Springer: Canada
Matson, J. L., & LoVullo, S. V. (2009). Encopresis, soiling and constipation in children and adults with developmental disability. Research in Developmental Disabilities, 30(4), 799–807.
NHS (2023) How to Potty Train. https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/baby/babys-development/potty-training-and-bedwetting/how-to-potty-train/
